Last month, I had two very different cardiac arrest resuscitations.
Read MoreI think one of the hardest things about emergency medicine residency and the constant changes of days and nights is loneliness. On a string of nights, you rarely get to see anyone outside of work.
Read MoreIt feels strange to read about these “old” entries from the earlier days of the pandemic. They are similar what we are going through now, with COVID cases surging once again in NYC.
Read MoreToday I had to tell one of the patients that she had a widespread lymphoma everywhere.
Read MoreSomething I’ve been doing lately-- combing the obituary section of the NY Times and seeing if anyone that I’ve taken care of & died have ended up there.
Read MoreI’ve been thinking that overall this residency has made me a worse person. I feel like I have less compassion.
Read MoreDuring the heaviest months of the pandemic, I fantasized about quitting residency and leaving medicine everyday.
Read MoreThe following is my second entry during the height of COVID pandemic. I remember everything was changing so fast. Everyday we got update emails on the number of cases, PPE preservation, city regulations, etc. This particular entry was written during a period of “calm before the storm.”
Read MoreThe next few entries are about my experience through the COVID pandemic— which, as it turns out, is still very much going on almost 8 months from my very first entry about the pandemic. There are some outdated information in these posts, as they were being written in real time.
Read MoreIntroducing myself as “doctor” hasn’t always felt easy and even now some deep part of me cringes, especially if I’m saying it in front of other more “established” and experienced doctors (attendings, seniors, etc).
Read MoreToday’s diary entry is the last entry I wrote as an intern. My intern year was difficult not only with the big transition in my training but also with the death of my longtime cat (more devastating than it sounds).
Spring always seems to bring on a fresh perspective.
Read MoreI was recently given the feedback that I was doing a great job as a senior resident BUT that I should work on being more confident. This particular feedback is one I’m familiar with. I do tend to be on the quieter side. I'm rarely yelling over others to be heard (though this is a thing I have had to do as a 3rd year leading codes and traumas).
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